A bride shared on Reddit that her future mother-in-law made a comment about her weight after she went wedding dress shopping
“Her comment really hurt, especially since she’s always been kind before,” the bride wrote
Her fiancé also made a remark about her body when she told him of the interaction
A bride received some unwanted feedback from her future mother-in-law.
In a post on Reddit’s “Wedding Drama” forum, she shared that her mother-in-law made a comment about her weight after she went wedding dress shopping.
The bride is set to get married next April to her partner of seven years. She noted that she’s not “super close” to her fiancé’s family but has “always felt welcomed and accepted.”
However, now she is questioning her relationship with her mother-in-law.
The bride explained that she recently went wedding dress shopping, and her mother-in-law was unable to join. “I felt beautiful in the dresses, took lots of photos, and was excited to share them,” she wrote of the experience.
Later that day, her mother-in-law texted to ask about the shopping outing, and the bride sent over the photos she had taken. According to the bride, her fiancé’s mom “picked a favorite saying it looks best on me, but then added, ‘Plus you’ll lose a few pounds so that it looks better.’ “
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Stock photo of a bride looking at wedding dresses
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“I’ve never mentioned wanting to lose weight. I am maintaining a healthy lifestyle for health reasons, not for size,” the bride explained. “Her comment really hurt, especially since she’s always been kind before. I know older generations often mean well, but having struggled with body image growing up, it felt like she was saying I wasn’t pretty enough as I am.”
She added that she is “healthy and at a good weight for my height.”
The situation worsened when the bride told her fiancé about the interaction with his mom.
“While he’s always supportive and never critical of my body, I think he misunderstood and thought I was upset about needing to lose weight,” she wrote. “He said, ‘Don’t worry, we’ll step up our gym routine and be in great shape by then.’ “
The bride said her partner’s comment left her even more upset. “It felt like he agreed I needed to lose weight,” she explained, adding that when she questioned her fiancé about his remark, he had nothing to say.
“I don’t want him to confront his mom or demand an apology,” the bride said. “I just needed him to reassure me that I don’t have to lose weight to be beautiful. Instead, he unintentionally doubled down.”
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Stock photo of two women arguing
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The bride shared that she will avoid conversations about her appearance with her mother-in-law in the future, but wondered if it was worth bringing up how the comment made her feel.
Readers were quick to side with the bride. Many noted that the mother-in-law’s comment was unnecessary, although they encouraged the Reddit user to try to see the situation from another perspective.
“I told my mom many times to stop talking about people’s weight, one way or another, but she just can’t help herself. I’ve listened to her talk about wanting to lose the same 5 lbs for all my life at this point. All she thinks about is losing weight, so she assumes that’s other people’s goal too,” one person wrote. “Not excusing or anything, just giving you [a] possible perspective that it might not be about your weight at all.”
Another suggested that the photos may not have shown the dress from a flattering angle.
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Upset bride (stock image)
“It’s possible that in the pictures, the dresses didn’t show to their best advantage because they weren’t fitted exactly to you, or you may have needed a bra with better support, etc,” the person wrote, adding that the real problem lies with what the bride’s fiancé said.
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“I’d ignore what MIL said, but don’t ignore what your fiancé said. If he thinks you need to lose a few pounds and is conveying his message through his mother, that’s a pretty lousy thing to do. You’ll have to ask him why he can’t be honest with you,” they added.
A third reader suggested that the comment could have been “a generational thing.”
“You can let it go for now and see it as a generational thing. But if it happens again, you know that you will be prepared to react right away and shut it down,” the person wrote. “If you wanna set boundaries already and call her out, that is also understandable and okay. We shouldn’t have to just accept unsolicited comments about [our] bodies or weight.”
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