On Reddit, a woman writes that she and her husband had been trying to conceive for one year before getting pregnant
The couple chose to wait until her 12-week bloodwork confirmed the baby was at low risk for any disorders before telling her in-laws
Now, they are torn on whether to share the big news on Mother’s Day — which happens to be her sister-in-law’s first as a mother
One woman is feeling conflicted about when to share her big news with family: she’s expecting a baby!
On Reddit, the woman writes that she and her husband had been trying to conceive for one year before finally getting pregnant. After learning the exciting news, they chose to wait until her 12-week bloodwork confirmed the baby was at low risk for any disorders before telling her in-laws. That update came in just last week.
She explains that she and her husband live far from family, so they don’t get many opportunities to gather in person. With Mother’s Day coming up, they suggested getting together, and everyone agreed. Her husband saw it as the perfect time to announce the pregnancy, especially since it could be “at least another month” before they see everyone again.
But the timing raised concerns for the mom-to-be.
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Pregnant woman with her husband in stock photo
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“The thing is, my BIL and SIL had their first kid last year in September, and this will be her first Mother’s Day,” she writes. “She didn’t plan anything with the family ahead of time, and we technically [are] meeting the day before (so they’ll have the day to themselves), but I can’t help but wonder if we’re stepping on their toes by sharing the news that day? Especially when I consider that it has taken them many years, multiple miscarriages, and several rounds of IVF to finally have their baby.”
“My husband doesn’t see any issue with sharing the news, and since it’s his family I’m inclined to believe him,” she adds, “but I can’t help but feel like I would be the a——. I also suggested waiting to tell them till the end of the day, but my husband wants time for the family to process the news and talk about it.”
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Stock image of a pregnant woman
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Since posting, users have weighed in with advice and opinions. One person suggested a simple solution: her husband could talk privately with his brother or sister to see if they’d prefer the announcement be made another time.
Another user questioned the need to worry: “I know that in my family (and my wife’s) this wouldn’t be an issue. Mother’s Day isn’t about your mom, or your husband’s mom, or your SIL. It’s about motherhood! And you’re about to be part of the club.”
They added, “I think this is fine and cute, but if you have a specific reason to think your SIL is the type of person who would get upset, then I agree with a prior suggestion to maybe prep her in advance. A lot of people are so charmed by learning about a pregnancy before everyone else does that they are pretty persuadable.”
Someone else wrote, “It’s very considerate for you to think of them. But you initiated this. I think it’s fine to announce. And a sweet time to do that.”
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