NEED TO KNOW
A woman who wanted to keep her pregnancy a secret says her fiancé told his brother-in-law, who in turn told his mom
The woman writes that the situation made her “very mad,” and that she feels he went behind her back
But some on Reddit are arguing the woman needs to give her fiancé a break
A woman trying to keep her pregnancy under wraps was discouraged to learn that her mother-in-law found out — now, she wants to ensure the older woman doesn’t get any more involved.
The woman writes in an anonymous Reddit post that she and her fiancé initially decided to wait to tell people about the pregnancy, as she had an earlier miscarriage.
Meanwhile, her fiancé’s family is going through a rough patch while dealing with the loss of his sister. So, in an effort to provide some good news, the fiancé told his brother-in-law, who then told his mom, about the pregnancy.
“I’m very mad. I get that he wanted to tell his parents about it. And if he approached me differently I would’ve said yes,” she writes. “But telling them behind my back while I said I was uncomfortable with the timing. And not discussing it further made me furious.”
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Now, the man’s mother “is pestering me about questions and baby related stuff,” she writes.
“I simply told her I will let her know all the details as soon as I let other people know about the baby as well. He’s mad at me that I said I’m going to do that,” she writes. “He said I’m an a—— for withholding information from his mother. And I said his mother has no right to know any of the stuff anyway. I can choose what I share and with who. And frankly I told him to tell his mom that I’m not going to share anything until I’m ready.”
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Others on Reddit are weighing in, with many saying the woman might be best served by letting go of expectations.
“Most of us have a pre-conceived plan of how we will handle our pregnancy, but it doesn’t always work out like we envisioned. You need to let go of your control and anger – for your, your baby’s, and your relationship’s sake,” one commenter writes. “This is a very hard situation for everyone. You are worried about your pregnancy, and his family is having their own grief.”
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