NEED TO KNOW
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Taylor Odlozil and his late wife, Haley, began documenting their lives online in 2022 amid her diagnosis with terminal ovarian cancer
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In the many honest conversations they had about the direction life had taken, Haley knew that included Taylor finding love again
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The widower explains to PEOPLE what he’s found difficult about dating again
Taylor Odlozil is open to what the future holds.
Taylor, 33, spends much of his time online discussing the beautiful life he shared with wife Haley, who died of ovarian cancer in July 2023 at 30 years old. He also documents his experience raising their son, Weston, as they’ve navigated grief together since Haley’s death.
Taylor tells PEOPLE that he and Haley had talked many times about how the father and son would move forward. In doing so, Haley shared her hope that Taylor would find love again.
“She doesn’t want me to be alone. She would always say, ‘I want you to move on and be happy, but the thought of you with someone else makes me want to throw up,'” he recalls.
“Because we were very in love and it was weird for her to think that I would probably be with someone else and maybe remarried one day,” he admits. “But we definitely had the talk many, many times. She wanted Weston to have a mother figure.”
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In preparing for that future for them, Haley left something behind for the woman who ultimately wins Taylor’s heart and fills that role in Weston’s life.
“She left a letter to the next woman. I’ve never read it. It’s sealed, and whoever that woman is, I’m supposed to give that to her,” he shares.
“It’s got something, words of wisdom in there. I don’t know what it is, but I think that shows her love and her care for her boys, in making sure that that woman understands what she’s getting into and what she’s getting. I think that’s just very wise of Haley.”
When it comes to finding love again, Taylor has started to venture into the dating pool, but it’s as much of a process as anything else.
“I’ve gone on dates, and there are days where I think I’m ready and I feel good, and there are days I wake up that I’m like, ‘I don’t want to talk to anybody. I don’t think this feels right,'” he admits.
“It’s definitely been a challenge for me,” he adds. “I was just very, very in love with Haley, and it’s just taken me time to try to open up my heart to somebody else. It’s not as easy as people think. And I am struggling with it, but I am trying to take steps out of my comfort zone to grow as a human being and keep pushing forward. Maybe when that right person comes along, it won’t be as hard.”
Taylor is grateful for the online community that has followed his story with Haley and Weston since he first shared it in the fall of 2022.
“I just want to thank everyone that has followed along the journey. It’s meant the world to me and it touches my heart every day that so many people are affected by the story. And I feel so blessed that I get to make videos and tell the story and share it, and help brighten people’s days,” he says.
“It means a lot to me, and I’m just so grateful for my following. I love them and I’m just so blessed to have them.”
The last two years have brought a lot of change for Taylor, who says he sees a difference in his “understanding of life.”
“I see the beauty of life more than ever. It’s like the world around me has slowed down. I know that’s weird and sounds crazy, but it’s like I finally understand. Life is just hard. It’s going to be hard, and everything finds a way to work itself out. We get so stressed out over things that don’t matter,” Taylor says.
“Because I’ve been through such an immense amount of pain and such a hard thing in life, it’s really made everything else in my life so much smaller and easier to understand. I have no stress and no anxiety. I’m not depressed. I’m just grateful for the days I get. And because of my faith, I know that I’ll see her again.”
Read the original article on People
