NEED TO KNOW
A woman was left stunned after her date asked her to pick up the tab at the end of their meal
She agreed, only to later find out it was a “test” to make sure she was not a “gold digger”
The woman then ended things with the man, but he has continuously tried to contact her
A promising first date took an unusual turn for one woman when she found herself the subject of an unexpected – and highly uncomfortable – “test” organized by her date.
The 29-year-old shared her story with the Reddit community, recounting an experience that began with good conversation and common interests, only to turn into a manipulative and unsettling interaction.
Set up by a mutual friend, the woman and her date, a 31-year-old man, met at a café where they ordered coffee and pastries.
“The date actually started out really well,” she wrote. “We had a lot in common, great conversation, and honestly I was feeling pretty good about it.” However, when the $100 check arrived, things changed.
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Stock image of a couple enjoying some drinks.
She was prepared to split the amount, but instead, her date handed her the bill and asked, “Is it alright if you pay for this?”
While she was caught off guard, she was not particularly concerned about the cost, so she agreed to cover the meal.
“Right after I paid, he got this huge grin on his face and said, ‘Congratulations, you passed the test! You’re not a gold digger,’ ” she recalled.
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Her date then admitted he’d been burned in the past by an ex who expected him to foot the bill for everything – from dinners to trips. As a result, he now “tests” women to ensure they’re not after his money.
“I told him that I’m not his ex and he has no right to treat me like I’m guilty until proven innocent,” she emphasized before getting up to leave. “I also said he’s not some prize that I need to pass tests for.”
After the date, she informed their mutual friend about the situation and made it clear she wanted nothing more to do with him. Despite blocking him from contacting her, that wasn’t the end of the story.
In an update to her Reddit post, she revealed that he continued to reach out to her using new accounts and obscure messaging apps. He even attempted to connect via LinkedIn.
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Stock image of a woman in a restaurant bathroom.
“At first, it was stuff like ‘I just want to explain,’ then ‘You’re not like other girls, I know that.’ Then it turned into full paragraphs about how I’m ‘punishing’ him for protecting himself and how he’s the one who feels betrayed,” she wrote.
Though she hasn’t responded to any of his attempts, the ongoing contact has taken a toll. “It’s gotten to the point where just seeing a notification with his name gives me this weird, anxious feeling,” she explained.
Reflecting on the date, she realized that it was never about genuine connection. “He didn’t go on a date to get to know me, he went to judge me, compare me to his ex, and see if I ‘measured up,’” she wrote. “And now he’s acting like I owe him a second chance because I ‘passed.’ ”
The real issue for her was the lengths of his manipulation. “I have a good career, I own property, I’m very financially independent,” she explained. “I absolutely don’t want to be anyone’s ATM either. But I would never pull a stunt like that to ‘test’ someone’s character.”
Read the original article on People
